Monday, October 30, 2006

Help

He dresses like a gay biker boy from the 1970s. He spouts enough annoying, inane clichés about ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ to cure any seasoned insomniac. Oh, and if you look closely you can see the exact line where his foundation ends and his neck begins.

So what’s the deal with Shaktiman? Did someone wake up after years in cold storage and said, “Hey, you know what? Kids are stupid.”

I caught an episode the other day. Get this. Bad guy with bad wig (that might as well be a placard saying ‘Note: this is bad guy’) is doing something bad to someone.
Shaktiman comes to the rescue. Oh damn. There’s still fifteen minutes on the clock before the next programme starts. Never mind, Shaktibaby looks like he got a plan. He stands there in front of the villain, hands firmly placed on his hips. I’m thinking, maybe he’s going to start shaking to ‘Shake your groove thing’.

Instead, he starts rambling for fourteen minutes about how the villain is evil and how he is here to stop him. Yup. One line and fourteen minutes worth of different interpretations. Oh lucky, lucky me.

Oh and the best part is, the villain stands right there and LISTENS quietly. Hey dumb ass, Shaktiman’s a bit busy right now, run for it, you ninny.

Then Shaktiman throws some bad special effects at villain. Villain dodges. Laughs wicked laugh (So if you had any doubts, now you KNOW he’s the bad guy). Shaktiman throws another poorly designed special effect at him. Shaktiman wins.

Is it over? Ha! You wish. Shaktiman has another ‘important’ message to give. This time to the viewers (huh?). So he begins delivering another monotonous boring speech, while staring deeply into the camera, looking as if his toilet hasn’t been flushed in a while. It’s a wonder his jaw hasn’t dislocated with all that yapping.

Someone just informed me that apparently a kid somewhere decided to ape Shaktiman and jumped off a building in an attempt to fly. An excellent idea. The next time the show airs, I think I'll follow suit.

6 Comments:

Blogger prado said...

HAaahaaaaaaaaa.
Girl you just made the only Indian superhero look somewhat interesting to me. Being Sarci there.
Surely never bothered to watch that show and never intend to; your post sounds better then that. The show should display WARNING: PLEASE DO NOT TRY DOING THIS AT HOME RATHER WHERE YOUR UNDIES OVER YOUR PANTS.

3:32 pm  
Blogger Jonathan said...

This is soooooo much better than Xena. (although i think no other woman can launch a dagger from her cleavage). What time does it come on anyway?

11:05 am  
Blogger Deepti Raavi said...

shaktimaan himself:

hey manushya, tumhari jurrat kaise huyi mera apmaan karne ki. tum mere prachandh prakop ko jaanti nahin. tumhe mein dekh lunga.

(pls contact deepti for translation)

11:21 am  
Blogger phantasmagoria said...

why do you have to see the show?

5:38 pm  
Blogger "A"ustin said...

i think you SHOULD follow suit!!!!

5:40 pm  
Blogger Deepti Raavi said...

translation: (shaktiman says......)

hey human, how dare you insult me. you have no idea about the kind of fierce reactions i give out to people like you. l will see you.

2:26 pm  

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